The Charity Auction
by mabelreid
Summary: One Shot Emily's mother holds an auction for Charity and guess which three men get sold off to the highest bidder.


Disclaimer: see my profile

A/n this takes place around Thanksgiving this year. This one shot was written as an answer to a challenge from cjcold. Please enjoy.

"Come on Reid… It's for charity!" Garcia said, as she followed the horrified young genius from conference room.

"Yeah kid, we're all helping out and it'll be over before you know it."

Reid stopped, Garcia nearly ran into his back, and Morgan flew past him five feet before noticing he had stopped. "It's an auction!" Reid squeaked. "I have to go out with some woman I've never seen before," He went on in agitation.

"You'll do fine." Morgan backtracked to his friend. "Just do what you do with us on the plane."

"What's that?"

"Bore her to death with a bunch of statistics and facts no one else cares about."

Emily, JJ and Garcia nodded in agreement at this idea.

"Thank you all for your support!"

Reid limped away as fast as he could with his cane.

"We're just kidding." Garcia hurried after him to his desk.

Reid tossed down the file he'd picked up but wasn't really looking at and turned on his friend. "Why aren't you badgering Rossi like this? Hotch, Morgan and I have to go up there on display like pieces of meat and he doesn't have to participate."

"Ha… you included yourself in the participants." Garcia said excitedly.

Reid went crimson. "It was a slip of the tongue. I don't want to do this." He insisted.

"A Freudian slip," Morgan teased.

"I don't believe in Freud."

"It's for a good cause," Emily reminded him, "The District of Columbia Mental Health Association."

"That's a low blow Emily." Reid said.

They all stood staring at him until he threw up his hand. "Alright… I'll do it, but only for the charity!"

"Don't worry baby cakes, me and the girls will have you looking so hot, you'll melt the stage."

"I will?" His face had been returning to its normal color. Now it went back to crimson at that remark.

"Of course," Emily chimed in. "It's black tie after all."

"Why?" Sheer panic flooded Reid's face.

"Because my mother's the head of the committee that's putting together the auction," Emily said, "Were you listening to me in there?"

"No! I sort of tuned you out after the word 'auction'," he admitted.

"Don't worry… Garcia will make sure you rock the house." JJ said.

"Wonderful!"

----

"I look ridiculous!" Reid said pulling on the black tie of his tuxedo.

"You look smokin' hot, baby boy!" Garcia brushed at the shoulders of his coat.

Reid went crimson and tried to pull out of her grasp.

"I'm not finished yet. Stand still!"

"Morgan!"

Derek swaggered up behind Reid in the mirror, looking like he'd been born in a tuxedo and shiny black shoes.

"Don't look at me kid. I can't control my baby-girl. Just stand there, be a good boy and do what she tells you."

"Thank you stud!"

Reid stood still in front of the full-length mirror. He tried not to think about how much he wanted to run away. It was too late now. He'd promised Emily, and by extension, her mother, he'd do this. Still, his help wouldn't bring in a lot of money. The tuxedo looked ridiculous despite what Garcia said. She'd also forced him to get his haircut. Okay, so his hair had needed a trim pretty badly. He looked down at his cane. That was the last nail in the coffin for him. No one would look twice at him with that cane.

"Wake up Reid…. It's time to go out to the party." Emily said from behind him.

"Great… I'm looking forward to it." He snapped.

She smiled, "Just remember it's for a good cause."

----

The main ballroom of the Lincoln Plaza Hotel in Washington DC had a huge window looking straight out at the Capital building. The sun had made it's descent to the west leaving the light outside dark blue, purple and rose in the sky.

Reid, Morgan, JJ, Hotch, Emily and Garcia stepped off the elevator bringing them down from the sixteenth floor and the suite Elizabeth Prentiss had gifted the group to get ready for the party. The entryway had wreaths of holly and evergreen boughs hanging from the arc overhead. Lights in red, gold and white twinkled all over the huge tree in the corner of the room. A stage set up at the north end of the room had a long table with a forest green tablecloth. The auction would feature several works of art donated by some of the more wealthy guests. Some had donated memorabilia and services. Emily's mother had agreed to set up the first part of the auction that would feature three men from the FBI as dates for some of the single women

"Ladies and Gentlemen," Elizabeth said into the microphone. "Please gather around for the 25th annual Thanksgiving night Charity auction to benefit the District of Columbia Mental Health Association. Please join me in thanking the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI for loaning us three eligible bachelors to help us raise money for such a worthy cause."

The room erupted in to excited conversation and clapping as the guys went up to the stage. Hotch led the way with his usual glower firmly in place. Morgan followed him, smirking at the crowd of well-dressed women. Reid limped up the stairs last. He looked like he'd just made the trip to the electric chair.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome tonight's auctioneer, David Rossi of the FBI."

"So that's why he bowed out," Reid hissed at Morgan."

"Shut up and it'll all be over soon."

Rossi took over the microphone from Elizabeth. He smiled at the guys and began the introduction for Hotch who stepped forward to stand next to his teammate.

"Alright ladies," Rossi said after introducing Hotch as the most eligible former prosecutor slash FBI profiler in DC, which had earned him a withering stare. "Who'll give me one hundred dollars for a date with Aaron Hotchner?"

One older woman, with white hair, wearing a grey silk dress raised her number eagerly.

"One hundred dollars ladies… Don't miss out on a night of candlelight and a dinner at La Caille followed by dancing at the Starlight Room at the top of this very hotel."

"Two hundred dollars," a blond woman in a low cut green satin party dress with her hair piled on top of her head, called out."

"Two hundred dollars," Rossi said over the whispers that ran through the crowd. "Come on ladies, you can do better than that for charity."

Rossi kept the crowd worked up until a plump woman in a purple dress with graying brown hair placed the winning bid of twelve hundred dollars.

Hotch went down to talk with her and surprised the rest of team by smiling at her graciously. She looked like she'd swoon at his feet, which had Morgan laughing like crazy.

"Okay ladies, settle down and pay attention. The next agent up for sale is Derek Morgan, former ATF agent and now FBI profiler slash Unit Chief."

Morgan swaggered forward to an excited reaction from the crowd of women. "The lucky lady willing to open her wallet wide for Agent Morgan will enjoy a carriage ride at sunset along the Potomac followed by a candlelight dinner at The Carriage House." Surely that's worth at least three hundred to start." Rossi asked the excited crowd of women.

Two women, a tall African American woman with long spiral curled black hair hanging around a siren red dress with a halter-top, and a short blonde wearing a short black dress with a flared skirt, fought over Morgan raising the price to twenty-five hundred dollars. The winning bid came from the blonde who screamed in triumph with a couple of friends standing nearby, much to the chagrin of her competition.

Reid limped up to stand next to Rossi when his teammate called him up front. Everyone stared at him and he wished his cane would disappear. Actually, he wished the floor would open up and swallow him.

"Now Ladies, we have a real treat for you with our last bachelor. Dr. Spencer Reid has three doctorates. He's an FBI profiler and one of the nicest guys I know. Don't worry about the cane… He's recovering from a gunshot wound, while saving a man's life. Sorry ladies, Dr. Reid didn't do his homework and provide a description of your date. You'll have to come up with something on your own time. I'm sure you ladies won't have difficulty with that!"

The whispering and talking increased dramatically at this announcement. Several of the women were eyeing Reid as though he was breakfast, lunch and dinner all rolled into one.

Reid raised a hand to pull at his tie. His hand froze halfway up to this throat on a sideways look from Rossi. He put his hand in one pocket and decided to look at the Capital building outside the huge window behind the crowd.

"So ladies, who has two hundred to start the bidding,"

The same African American woman that had bid for Morgan put up her number and winked at Reid.

"Thank you…" Rossi said. "Do I hear three hundred?"

A redhead with short choppy hair, diamond teardrops at her ears and green eyes indicated her acceptance of this price.

"Shall we say four hundred ladies?"

The same white haired woman who'd lost Hotch to the plump woman in purple bid four hundred. A black haired woman with a purple streak matching her dress bid five hundred and bidding war began. Reid looked to his left at JJ and Emily who watched the crowd. He tried to get one of them to look at him as two of the four women, the red head and the black haired woman with the purple strip continued to push the price up over a two thousand dollars.

He couldn't understand it. Why were they pushing up the price so far? This should have happened with Hotch or Morgan, but not him. It didn't make any sense unless they really liked raising money for charity. Yeah… that had to be it.

Then, a voice he knew called out right after the redhead bid twenty three hundred dollars and the black haired woman looked like she might give up.

"Five thousand," Emily shouted.

Reid nearly fell off the stage in surprise.

The redhead and the purple stripe looked daggers at Emily. The purple stripe shrugged and shook her head.

"Five thousand five hundred," The redhead said with a smirk.

"Six thousand," Emily countered going very pink in the cheeks and ignoring JJ who'd elbowed her in the side of her golden satin gown.

"Seven thousand," the redhead countered.

"Ten thousand," Emily shouted.

"Twelve thousand!"

"Fifteen thousand," Emily said.

"Honey," the redhead called out to Reid, "You're hot, but not fifteen thousand dollars hot. She wants you that badly, she can have you."

"Sold for fifteen thousand to the lady in gold," Rossi said.

Reid left the stage in a storm of catcalls whistles and applause to meet up with Emily. "What are you doing?" He shouted over the noise.

She pulled him out of the ballroom and into the empty foyer near two double glass doors with the logo of the hotel carved in gold leaf.

"Saving your cute ass, Dr. Reid."

"But -"

"Do you want to go out with one of those cougars? If you do I can always withdraw…"

"No!" He said quickly.

"Good, then say thank you Emily."

"Thank you Emily."

She linked her arm through his and they walked back into the ballroom. "You can't pay fifteen thousand dollars." Reid squeaked.

"Dr Reid, just because I work for the FBI and just because I don't really get along with my mother doesn't mean I don't have a little money. I have a trust fund that I hardly ever touch. I wanted to do something for charity."

"I thought you wanted to bid on one of the art pieces here." He asked, perplexed.

"I found a better use for my money." She said.

"I didn't think you could bid as your mom is on the committee."

"There's nothing in the rules that say I can't," Emily reminded him.

"Right!'

"So Reid," She stopped near the Christmas tree in the south corner. "Since I spent all that money on you, you better make it worth my while." She gave him a hot, avarice look and a wink.

Reid gaped in confusion at her. "What do you mean by that?"

"I'm sure if you think about it long enough Reid, you'll figure it out for yourself."


End file.
